Tag: Core

  • Shortsightedness – Cranio Sacral Wall No.2 and How To Pass Through It.

    ShortsightedWhen a person comes to you for treatment and you are working with them to get a sense of what the cause of their symptoms is, being shortsighted, or not seeing deep enough, is a major wall in cranio sacral work and will result in mediocre, impermanent results.

    Fixating on physical causes and what the right technique to use for the physical manifestation might be, often overlooks the deeper causes for symptoms.  And I’m not talking about trauma or emotional issues.

    No single technique is ‘the’ technique for ANYTHING.  Techniques are ways we get a handle on the bigger picture. And the biggest picture is what you need to be available for.

    I am putting it like that because describing it as ‘looking’ for the biggest picture is way too active, eager, inefficient and INTURSIVE. You need to ask yourself, what is really going on here? Why has this person got these particular symptoms? Why are the symptoms in this configuration? What’s the root cause of this situation?

    Symptoms generally manifest physically, meaning they show up in the person’s body.  These problems are characterised by very physical causes and descriptions, “The tentorium cerebelli is pulled inferiorly here, causing pressure there . . .etc.” But that doesn’t mean the CAUSE of those symptoms is exclusively physical.

    Often EMOTIONAL issues will express themselves as physical symptoms.  Restrictions in the emotional aspect of the person can be caused by old emotional trauma.

    It doesn’t just stop there, often the root cause of what is going on has a physical component, caused by an emotional component but the root cause is not emotional it is something DEEPER.

    That may sound spooky or kooky to you depending on your slant but I have seen it time and again, where the root cause was deeper than physical and emotional issues.

    Core problems
    These relate to how the person sees themselves in their lives, their relationship with themselves, with God, with their idea of God.  A feeling that they are off track.

    And no, you don’t need to know what their track is.  Core problems can feel like fundamental disharmonies within the person. They are the hardest to perceive because they are so deep in the person. A disharmony in a person’s core will affect them emotionally and in turn affect them physically. 

    For example, someone might think they are fundamentally bad. This could manifest emotionally as anxiety and paranoia, which could manifest physically as headaches and chronic fatigue. The skill comes in being able to assess where the root cause of the problem is. 

    jumpingMost core issues circulate the person’s core question and to explain what that is you will need to imagine you are a kid. Not just any kid but a who likes to run and jump.  All day long you run and jump around in a big field at the back of your house. Running and jumping, jumping and running. Man, you just love to run and jump.

    Then let’s say one evening you’re looking at the telly and you see the 400m hurdles race at the Olympics. You are mesmerised as you watch the race. This is running-and-jumping heaven.

    As you look at it you hear a voice in the back of your head saying, “I wonder? I wonder if I could do that? I wonder if I could do that in the same way they’re doing it?  I wonder if I could be as good as that?”

    So you find your local athletics club and join it and you begin to practice. In time you become good enough to qualify for the state team and eventually you become good enough to make it to the Olympics.

    hurdlesLooked at from another perspective we could say that you have voluntarily taken on a series of constraints to help you answer a question about yourself.  When you were running around in the field you had no constraints.  In the Olympics you have many, you have to run within the lines of the track, you have to jump over hurdles of a specific height, and you can only start running when the starting gun fires.  You accept all these constraints because they help you answer your burning question, “I wonder how good I could be at this?”

    The voluntary adoption of constraints for the purpose of finding something out about yourself.  Hold on to that idea while I ask you some personal questions. As you think of the answers, I’d like you to discount any answers that come to you that someone else told you or from anything you’ve read.
    Ready? Here are the questions.

    Why were you born a man or a woman?
    Why were you born the race you were born?
    Why were you born in the country you were born in?
    Why were you born to the parents you were born to?

    Remember, leave out any answers you’ve been told or read.

    I think if you’re honest, you have to admit that you don’t ‘know’ the answers to these questions.  The funny thing is, we all have a sense that there ARE answers to these questions and the answers are NOT random.

    I discovered, through working with people with life threatening conditions, that in the same way that the kid who loved to run and jump eventually went to the Olympics to find out something about themselves, our lives are about finding something out about ourselves. What we are trying to find out is an extremely personal question for each of us.

    The four constraints I asked you about in my questions, your sex, your race, your nationality and your parents are part of the constraints we voluntarily adopt to help us explore the question we have about ourselves. These four are just the tip of the iceberg of constraints we have voluntarily adopted to help us.

    How often have you wondered at the apparent synchronicity of events in your life.
    Why that thing happened as against the other thing happening?
    Why this person and not that one?
    Why was that done and not something else?
    The different things that happen to us are tailor made to help us with our question.

    The different constraints we adopt are individual to each of us.
    All except one.
    The one constraint we all share is we don’t know what it is we’re trying to find out.  We don’t know what our question is.

    As to why that is I can only guess that it’s similar to reason we get upset if someone tells us the end of a movie. Particularly if it’s a movie we really wanted to see. Even if they tell us that the movie has a happy ending. It still feels like it’s ruined.

    Let me take a moment here to highlight that point. Even if the ending of the movie is a happy one we still feel like we’ve been gypped in some way. It sort of follows then that we are more interested in the watching of the movie than we are in the happy ending.

    I’m stressing this point because it is an analogy for life. I think one of the possible reasons we don’t know what our question is is because we are more interested in the living of our life and the exploration of that question than we are in knowing what the question is.

    In my experience, there is a deeper part of ourselves that does know what our question is. It has known from the beginning. It looks out into our lives with what could be described as dispassion, though I don’t think that’s what’s really going on.  It has a VERY broad view of our lives. It knows that in 200 years we will be dead and no one will know us. We might be remembered as a two dimensional historic figure but no on will know us in the way we are known by the people in our lives who know and love us now.
    I don’t mean to bum you out but it’s true.
    We know this too of course but we often live as if we don’t. We live as if we have all the time in the world.

    That deeper part of us is a bit like a compassionate Clint Eastwood. Eerily quiet. It never actually speaks directly to us yet it never lets us forget about our question. It doesn’t care about the silly sorts of things we care about, like life and death and food and security. It will break up our marriage. It will have all our money taken from us. It will make us sick if it needs to get our attention.

    That’s why I say it can appear ruthless but the reality is it knows that our lives are very transitory and the whole point is to explore this question we have about ourselves. So it forces us to keep facing it, even when we don’t want to.

    Whether you are working with an adult or a child makes no difference. This question is something we all work with from the beginning to the end of our lives.

    In most cases you won’t have a strong sense of what the person’s question is and that’s okay.  Remember this is a very private part of a person and information is given on a need-to-know basis.  If you get any insights about it, it will be because you were given or allowed them by that deeper part of the person.

    So you remain open to information about what the person’s question might be while being VERY humble and respectful of anything you receive about it.

    Before you go charging off into the great mystery, let me add this. It can be as easy to go the other way and start looking for deep emotional and core issues as the root cause of a purely physical problem.  “I just twisted my knee Mate!”

    I know that contradicts everything I said previously but you should have figured out by now that cranio sacral work is full of paradox.  The way to know the difference is to trust the process.  Trite, I know, but also true. Some part of the person picked you out and identified you as the one who could help them. Some part of the person brought them to see you, brought them in the door. And it’s the same part that will show you what it needs help with, physical, emotional or deeper

    I know. Try not to damage too much of the furniture. It will sound more helpful in a couple of minutes.

     

  • Core Success Seminar in Brisbane 07.

    Jenny Palmer invited me to give a postgraduate seminar in Brisbane in April 07. I delivered my ‘Core Success’ seminar, which is a seminar for therapists generally not just cranio sacral therapists. As well as the Brisbane folk, some therapists flew up from Sydney. Here is what Jenny has to say about it.

    Lost and Found – gifts from John Dalton’s Core Success workshop in Australia.
    by Jenny Palmer.

    If you’ve ever been fishing, you’ll know that casting the line out may be the trickiest part. It’s important to get the bait right out to where the fish are biting.
    Sometimes, you find huge balls of tangled fishing line amongst the rocks, where someone did that thing where the line spools out into a giant knot behind you, instead of flying cleanly through the air in front of you. In desperation, they cut the line and get rid of the giant knot instead of spending hours trying to undo it.

    So what’s that got to do with a craniosacral workshop?

    Well, before John came back to Australia to do the seminar, I had loads of questions – about my practice, about some people I’m treating and about cranio in general. It felt a bit like a giant ball of knotted fishing line. There had been years of ‘stuff’ happening in my personal life as well that seemed to have sucked the essence of ‘hope’ from my being.

    So, the day of the Core Success workshop finally dawned and in I went, expecting to get loads of answers. John welcomed everyone and began the day with the statement that he had ‘no answers for anyone’.
    Great! I thought…….

    What John was going to attempt to do was to help everyone realise that they inherently had the answers all along. (I thought, ‘Like a good cranio session perhaps?’)

    Using simple exercises (the ‘interactive’ part), there began a gradual awakening to John’s opening statement. It’s often shocking when things are revealed to you in seemingly simple ways. It reminds me of my own inner ‘complicatedness’. My brain gets in the way at times and wants to know everything – right now – please!

    After a couple of these interactive exercises, I couldn’t really remember my list of questions. They’d disappeared, or the couple I could remember seemed to not really be questions at all. (That may be categorised as having a ‘seniors’ moment, but I don’t think so.) It was like holding that big ball of knotted fishing line and all you really have to do is find that one little strand that seems to hold it all together – the more you dig your fingers in and search, the more frustrated you get. The tighter the knots seem to get. But if you just sit with it, soften your eyeballs and really look at it, see how the threads are running, the one bit that holds it together will become apparent. Just loosen it, a little, and see how the ball of knots falls apart, slowly, slowly, easily…

    As the day progressed, I got some wonderful insights into myself and my practice and the people I’m treating and how I’m approaching everything. I had been having some serious doubts about myself, and my ability to help some people. My hope had taken a battering. That had also affected my faith, in myself.

    Some of what I really got was:
    • We’re NOT in the business of imparting wisdom (that’s a relief in itself).
    • We don’t teach people to ride a bike by riding it for them.
    • Assumption – if people come to me they want to get better.
    • Assumption – when it looks like you’re sharing a reality, you’re not.
    • We really don’t want to know the end of the movie before we see it
    – even if it is a happy ending.
    • Our biggest trap is success (you think you know for certain what’s going on).
    • The other main trap is failure (you’re certain you’re no good).

    And the most beautiful, yet unsettling thing?

    You’re part of the liberation that you might not even see……

    And that’s the beauty of the mysterious, still places that we go to every day as therapists. Or, as that infamous ex US Defence Secretary once said. “As we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns — the ones we don’t know we don’t know.”
    Makes perfect sense to a craniosacral therapist.

    We (craniosacral therapists) are pioneers. And that’s tough in itself. It’s enriching to get together with other practitioners and students and just chat. I wish we could do that more often. In the meantime, I sit back in that great ‘armchair’ and find the stillness that’s demanded of us the most (and remember, you can’t see round corners).
    The day was lovely – I want to thank John. For his wisdom and insight and understanding.

    He created a still place for us all (calming and unsettling) – inspiring, gentle, nourishing, illuminating, warm (just like a good cranio session?). What I got from that day is still unravelling in myself, and in my practice. I’ve really moved forward with what I want to be doing, and it’s falling very nicely into place.
    I can’t wait for next year’s workshop – I’m starting on my list of questions now. (Kidding!)

    Jenny Palmer
    www.ynt.com.au

  • Sciatica

    + Which technique should I use? – September 05

    + Comment from Al Pelowski, principal tutor with The South
    African Institute of Cranial Studies. on sciatica- October 05


    Hi John,
    Found your web site very useful and your URL easy to remember.
    I use it as my virtual business card. I have been treating a man in
    his late fifties with sciatica. I have had some success but feel I
    could achieve more.

    Can you recommend any techniques that you have found
    particularly useful for sciatica?
    Thanks
    J.P.
    Brisbane.

    >>>MY COMMENTS:

    Glad you like the site.
    I’m going to answer your question in two parts. Let me start by
    saying no one technique is ‘the’ technique for ANYTHING.

    Techniques are ways we get a handle on the bigger picture.
    And the biggest picture is what you need to be available for.
    I am putting it like that because describing it as ‘looking’ for
    the biggest picture is way too active, eager, inefficient and INTURSIVE.
    You need to ask yourself, what is really going on here?
    Why has this person got these particular symptoms?
    Why are the symptoms in this configuration?
    What’s the root cause of this situation?

    Symptoms generally manifest physically, meaning they show up
    in the person’s body.  But that doesn’t mean the CAUSE of those
    symptoms is exclusively physical.

    Often EMOTIONAL issues will express themselves as physical symptoms.
    It doesn’t just stop there, often the root cause of what is going
    on has a physical component, caused by an emotional component
    but the root cause is not emotional it is something DEEPER.

    That may sound spooky or kooky to you depending on your slant
    but I have seen it time and again, where the root cause was deeper
    than physical and emotional issues.

    How can that be?

    Let’s go through it one layer at a time.
    Physical problems.
    These problems are characterised by very physical causes and
    descriptions,  ‘The tentorium cerebelli is pulled inferiorly here,
    causing pressure there . . .etc’.

    Regardless of the source of a pattern of a restriction, it will show
    up physically.  Becoming accurate in identifying the extent and
    complexity of physical restrictions takes a lot of practice and is
    a prerequisite for working with the deeper causes.

    Emotional issues/causes.
    Restrictions in the emotional aspect of the person can have causes
    like, a person may need to leave a partner or job or it may be an old
    emotional abuse.
    Emotional restrictions are more difficult to identify accurately
    because it’s very easy to start theorising about the person’s problems
    instead of simply receiving the information from the person’s body in
    the same way you do with physical patterns.

    Core problems
    These relate to how the person sees themselves in their lives, their
    relationship with themselves, with God, with their idea of God.
    A feeling that they’re off track.
    And no, you don’t need to know what their track is.
    Core problems can feel like fundamental disharmonies within the
    person.  They are the hardest to perceive because they are so deep
    in the person.
    Your ability to see and work with these core issues comes with lots
    of practice and humility.
    Their revelation occurs in the dynamic between you and the person
    and what you have to offer each other.

    Are you with me?

    It generally works its way through the layers something like this.
    A disharmony in a person’s core will affect them emotionally and
    in turn affect them physically.
    For example someone might think they are fundamentally bad.
    This could manifest emotionally as anxiety and paranoia, which
    could manifest physically as headaches and chronic fatigue.
    The skill comes in being able to assess where the root cause of
    the problem is.

    Before you go charging off into the great mystery, let me add this.
    It can be as easy to go the other way and start looking for deep
    emotional and core issues as the root cause of a purely physical
    problem.

    ‘I just twisted my knee Mate!’

    Now the second part of my answer is purely physical.
    There are lots of different ways of creating sciatica.
    It’s a pain, which means there have to be nerves involved.
    The pain generally is in the lower back and travels down one
    leg or the other, sometimes both.

    Have a look at, [in books and with your hands] the lumbar plexus,
    the sacral plexus.  How are the nerves on both sides of the spinal
    column as they leave the vertebral foramina?

    Scan the nerves up as far as the thoraco-lumbar junction.
    Remember tight membranes can pull vertebrae together and pinch nerves.
    Consider how long the person has been getting the pain?
    Getting a sense of when and how the pattern of restriction was formed.
    So, look particularly at the dural tube.
    How are the membranes running?
    Most particularly how is the cerebro spinal fluid moving?
    Find ways to help it come into a harmonious flow.
    It’s all about flow.

    Top

    ***COMMENT FROM AL PELOWSKI***
    – On additional physical causes of sciatica.

    John,
    Some of the rootlets of the sciatic nerve pass through the psoas
    muscle – a noted emotional contractor- – slightly bent over posture,
    unable to fully extend hips without pain, affected leg externally rotated.
    Another sciatica tip: usually on right side, I-C Valve, Caecum.

    Yet other possibilities: Leg length differences, real bony differences,
    or more likely due to rotations in the leg from protecting an old sprained
    ankle or twisted knee — most commonly external rotation in the foot
    where there has been damage to the ankle lateral colateral ligaments
    — resulting in compression of the S-I joint and thus irritation of the epineuria.
    “from the ankle joint to the knee joint…etc” Remember the tune?

    Yo. Ta for newsletter. Much food for reflection
    A

    >>>MY COMMENTS:

    Thanks Al. All very useful places to look for the mechanics of
    the physical manifestation of sciatica.

  • Cancer

    + Cranio sacral therapy and Cancer -October 05

    Hi John,
    I have a friend who has had a mastectomy and partial
    lymphadenectomy and is currently receiving chemotherapy
    for active cancer in her neck. I was thinking that some
    CST would be helpful to assist her immune system (not
    to mention emotional state) but am concerned whether it
    would simultaneously stimulate the cancer which is
    quite an aggressive type.

    Let me know if you have any thoughts on the matter, I
    can provide more info if you need in order to advise me

    cheers Kylie

    —————–
    Kylie  Tobler.
    B.App Sc. (Occupational Therapy), Dip. CST
    Sydney.

    >>>MY COMMENTS:

    Your question goes right to the heart of what we do.
    My answer, in typical cranio fashion, is not clear cut.

    Maybe . .

    Maybe her system will use your treatment to grow the
    cancer more aggressively.

    Maybe her system will use your treatment to get rid
    of the cancer completely.

    By ‘system’ I mean everything. Mind, Body, Spirit,
    the lot and anything else we don’t know about.

    You see, all the warm and fluffy talk about us
    cranio sacral therapists not ‘doing’ anything but
    simply supporting the patient’s system isn’t
    hypothetical.

    It’s actually true.

    And if you know that and you are treating people
    well, which means not imposing your idea of what needs
    to happen on their systems, then you really have to
    face the fact that you’re not in control of what’s
    happening. .

    . . or going to happen.

    That concept is easy enough to accept when you are
    dealing with something simple that isn’t resolving.

    Everything feels ripe in the person’s system for an
    old pattern of restriction to release but it just
    won’t.

    It makes you sort of scratch your head and think,
    ‘Well that’s odd.  I can’t see any reason why it’s not
    releasing.’

    Then you remember, ‘Ah that’s right, I’m not running
    the show here.  There must be a reason that makes sense
    to this persons system and it just hasn’t informed me
    of it yet.’

    But . .

    When the person is manifesting life threatening
    symptoms the stakes are much higher.  It’s very easy to
    slip back into the mechanistic view of health and WANT
    a particular outcome.  In this case more life for the
    patient.

    But wait, it gets more complicated . .

    Being able to tell the difference between a patient
    who is thinking of finishing their life and one who is
    not, is difficult.

    Often what comes out of the person’s mouth is very
    different from what their system says.

    In one case the person says, ‘I am going to beat
    this.’  While their system says, ‘I can no longer live
    with this discord in me.  I am finishing my life.’

    In another case the person says, ‘I can’t bear this
    pain any longer.  I just want to die.’  While their
    system says, ‘I am fully engaged in my life and I want
    this discord in me to come into harmony.’

    Also. .

    In practice I’ve seen that there’s a different
    therapeutic dynamic between a patient and I, depending
    on whether their situation is life threatening or not.

    When a person comes to me for help and I put my
    hands on them, the unspoken communication from me to
    their system is always the same.

    What are you trying to do?
    How can I be of assistance?

    (Anyone NOT asking yourself those questions, go to
    the top of the class and bitch-slap the teacher.  Then
    get yourself a better teacher.)

    If the patient’s unspoken response is, ‘I am fully
    engaged in my life and I want this discord in me to
    come into harmony.’

    Then . . it’s on . .

    The dynamic between us is a bit like an Aikido
    expert trying to rodeo ride a Tasmanian Devil.
    (think Bugs Bunny)

    I’m the Aikido expert.

    No, not really – just for this analogy.

    The restriction is protected by many defences that
    come to the fore as the drive for harmony lets me in.

    I do my best to stay focused in spite of the
    barrage.

    I funnel all the energy they project in defence,
    back into their system, to assist the release.

    There is a back and forth struggle as I stay with
    them through the process of release and healing.

    All going well there is a sense of liberation at the
    end.  For both of us.

    If, on the other hand, the unspoken response to my
    question is, ‘I can no longer live with this discord in
    me.  I am finishing my life.’ then I am dealing with a
    totally different situation and the dynamic is very
    different.

    No back and forth, no struggle.

    Why?

    I’ll have to get a bit cosmic here to explain, so if
    you have any deeply held religious beliefs, you should
    maybe stop reading now as you might find what I’m going
    to say offends you . .

    Life threatening conditions are created at the core
    of the person. To effectively work with them requires
    deep respect for the origin of the choice.

    We are multi layered, multi faceted beings.  The
    part of us that makes this choice is not in our
    awareness.

    The choice to conclude our life is made in the same
    place as the choice to begin our life.

    The reasons for both choices are extremely personal
    and by their nature, not in our awareness.

    Put aside for a minute, any information you might
    have come upon from clairvoyants and channelers etc.

    Now consider these questions.

    Why were you born?
    Why did you choose the gender you did?
    Why did you choose the family you did?
    Why did you choose the country you did?
    And so on . .

    Don’t know?

    Me neither.

    If you don’t know the answer to these questions for
    your own life, how are you going to know them for
    someone else’s?

    . . and knowing that, helps you be HUMBLE and
    RESPECTFUL when working with someone dealing with these
    core issues.

    I can’t over emphasis this point.

    Deep, for real, humility and respect are an
    important key you are going to need if you really want
    to be of assistance.

    . . because, here’s the thing, the decision to
    finish a life is NOT IRREVOCABLE.

    It can change.

    Cancer is very dynamic.  Once it gets going it can
    grow very fast.

    . . . and it can un-grow very fast too.

    When you approach the person with humility, respect
    and NO AGENDA, a remarkable thing happens.  You are
    allowed deeper access to the core of the person.

    No kidding.

    Here’s why.

    There’s a phenomenon in quantum physics called the
    ‘Copenhagen Interpretation’.  It says that the presence
    of the observer influences the experiment.

    But only in Copenhagen!

    No, not really.

    The significant aspect of this phenomenon is
    presence.  Your presence makes a huge difference.
    Think about it.
    Your presence has been allowed into the part of the
    person that is making the life/death choice.

    A problem shared is a problem halved.

    Just being with the person at this level is of
    tremendous assistance to them.  A friendly companion on
    a difficult stretch of the road makes the journey
    easier.

    As you walk along together, them talking, you
    listening, they start to tell you about why they are
    finishing their life.  As they do this, more and more
    harmony comes into their system because of the effect
    of your respectful presence.

    Sometimes, as they tell you about why they are
    finishing their life, it becomes apparent to them that
    they’ve missed something, a piece of information or a
    perspective they hadn’t looked at.

    Suddenly they stop.

    You are at a fork in the road that wasn’t there a
    moment ago.  They smile at you and say, ‘I’m feeling
    somewhat Tasmanian, let’s go down this way.’

    and . . . it’s on.

    Other times they keep on the same road and their
    passage is made easier by your presence.

    Life for its own sake is not necessarily GOOD.
    Death in and of itself is not necessarily BAD.  The
    QUALITY of both, our life and our death are what
    counts.

    Often the road you travel with a person dealing with
    this issue has many forks and they change their mind a
    lot.

    The main assistance we can give is easing the
    process, brokering as much harmony in their system as
    possible.

    Make no mistake it’s very demanding.

    If you do decide to treat your friend, here are some
    things to look out for from a palpatory perspective.
    Bear in mind that palpation is a very personal affair
    and how I pick it up may not be the way you pick it up.

    What does it feel like?

    In the initial, PRE pre cancerous cell stage, it
    feels like an intensely bright point of light,
    incandescent.

    As the cancer becomes more materialised it becomes
    brighter and starts to grow legs like a spider.

    In time as it becomes ‘aggressive’ these legs
    connect up with other points of light and the whole
    thing becomes more solid.

    Eventually the center of this mass of white hot
    light becomes fleshy as the tumour proper forms.

    If the person changes their mind about finishing
    their life and the cancer starts to return to normal
    tissue it will go from the white hot quality to a sort
    of turgid yellow.

    This eventually turns into normal tissue.

    An exception to this pattern is prostate cancer,
    which feels like a white cocoon being spun around the
    prostate.  It is made up of threads and not spidery.

    Benign tumours don’t have this intense light quality
    and just sort of sit there like cellular couch
    potatoes, slowly getting bigger.  If they are a
    problem, it’s usually because they are pressing on
    delicate surrounding structures.

    Knowing what cancer feels like at its different
    stages of growth and decline is very useful in being
    able to pick up secondary or satellite growths.

    Here’s why . .

    If someone is intent on finishing their life and
    they have received surgery, chemotherapy and radiation,
    at the main site of the cancer, it often works.  The
    tumour is removed or shrinks and any new cancerous
    cells are killed too.

    But if the person is intent on finishing their life,
    their system will grow satellite cancer cells somewhere
    else and being able to feel this is very useful.

    As if all that weren’t enough . . .

    Knowing what cancer ‘feels’ like can be terrible
    knowledge because it puts you in the very difficult
    position of choosing what to say to the person.

    CAUTION! CAUTION! CAUTION!

    As a general rule.

    Keep your mouth SHUT!

    . . .and wait.

    Remember what I said, physically it can change very
    fast.  Here today, gone tomorrow.

    Literally.

    The life threatening symptoms are being created by a
    core part of the person.  That part uses speech and
    words VERY INFREQUENTLY and then only as a last resort.

    FOLLOW ITS EXAMPLE.

    Obviously if you’re asked a direct question, answer
    it but watch out for a tendency to answer questions
    that haven’t been asked.

    If you wait, the person will probably tell you what
    you are feeling anyway and this is much more powerful
    for them.

    Chemotherapy and Radiation therapy?

    These treatments are effective at killing cells,
    particularly cancer cells but they are very hard on the
    body.

    Chemotherapy feels like a very sophisticated
    cocktail of poison.  Which in a way, it is.

    Radiation therapy is like a very bad case of
    sunburn, repeated daily for 5 to 10 weeks.

    Both generate a, ‘What the?’ reaction in the body.
    You can be most helpful in negotiating with the
    person’s system to not see these treatments as so much
    of a threat but as an aid to recovery.  That’s if you
    are getting the feeling that they want to recover.

    If not, you can only do the best you can in a
    difficult situation.  Try not to turn away internally
    from their pain.  Try and continue to be with them on
    this painful stretch of the road.  Remain respectful of
    their process.

    So, Kylie,
    Cancer – Did I mention it was demanding?